Sunday, October 19, 2008

Time Passages

Saturday was a cool Autumn day and we were at one of the boys' last flag-football games for this season.  The man who was the referee for this game was our assistant coach last year.  During the game, he leaned over to us on the sidelines and said, "How old are your boys now?"  We told him that they were 10 and 11.  He said, "My baby's down there on the sidelines today. She's 21."  We all commented about how quicly time passes.

I can't believe that my first born will be 12 in two weeks.  I'm sure I gave birth to him yesterday.  In quiet-panicked moments I think, "Did I treasure it enough?  Have I savored his childhood?"  He's growing so quickly and, now, I can look him in the eye without stooping.

Later that same day, we were shopping in a grocery store.  One light  bulb in the boys' room needed to be replaced and the boys were anxious to replace it with a flourescent bulb.  We have never used these in our house.  The boys have watched the many commercials and news spots about "going green" and they wanted to begin using flourescents in our home.  So, we began to read the packaging and pick our lightbulb.  The bulb we picked had a large endorsement written on the front.  It said, "Guaranteed to work for Nine years!"  Our oldest, Big Mac, picked up the package and said, "When this dies I'll be..."  As he was figuring out the age, a large number 20 flashed in my brain and tears sprung into my eyes.  Right in the middle of the grocery store, I grabbed my boy in a big bear-hug.  He would be 20 when I had to replace that lightbulb.  20 is a man.  20 is not the beautiful dark-eyed, pleasant, loving boy standing before me, although I am confident that he will be all those things and more as a man. 

Time passes to quickly.  This weekend we celebrated our 16th anniversary.  I don't know how 16 years pass so quickly.  My mother turned 75 in September and she often comments on how quickly her life has passed.

So this week, my focus will be on focusing.  I want to be in the moment.  I want to focus on today and enjoy my boys before the flourescent bulb has to be replaced.

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